“A Christmas Story” in January:
Devon does his best impression of Randy.
~~~~~
Looking at a map of Asia:
Me: Have you guys ever heard of any of these countries? ‘Thailand’…’Vietnam?’
Hector: Nope. I hearda China though. Where’s New Hamster?
Me: …wait, whuh? Do you mean, New Hampshire?
Hector: Yeah, it’s a continent right?!
Grinning, I went back to memorizing African capitals.
I was busy last week. And that’s before I remembered that I had to chaperon a trip to The Nutcracker for the 3rd
No one told me this...
graders I tutor. I had already agreed to it so I couldn’t back out. Alex and Nicole’s jealousy (“Oh can I come too” and “I’ll go in your place if you want!”) didn’t make me any more excited to see the ballet. Regardless, we all got on the bus and headed for Lincoln Center.
…and then Monika, who groans a lot as is, started groaning.
“I don’t feel well,” she said.
“Oh. Well we’re almost there. Don’t worry about it,” I say quickly.
…then she starts tearing up.
…then I rush to alert a real adult.
…and then she projectile vomits twice straight onto the seat. the plastic bag was two seconds too late.
Nooo, that didn’t just happen. Nahhh.
Ms. Walsh says “I can’t believe you stayed there. I would’ve hopped out of my seat and ran for it.”
“This is disgusting. Yuck, gross. I’m gonna be a terrible father.”
“They say it’s entirely different with your own kid.”
“Geez, I sure hope so…ah Monika, use the napkin to wipe it up.“
Yeesh, I sure hope so.
*****
…would be accompanied by this:
Andre has a Mohawk. He’s also exceedingly bright (and apparently too clever for his own good).
Eric: Hey Andre, just out of curiosity, do you know what ethnicity you are? or where your parents are from?
Andre: My dad said he’s from Jamaica.
E: Oh, alright. That’s cool.
A: Jamaica, Queens.
E: (laughs)
A: And Jamaica the country.
E: Ah, I see I see.
“Is he wearing a hat or garlic?” Tonique’s not only good at math, she’s also very perceptive (because I kinda thought the same thing the first time I picked up this book haha).
“I’m done with having boyfriends. Africans don’t have boyfriends.”
~ a Ghanaian student in the class I tutor (she’s my favorite).
